we all like to think that we’re law-abiding citizens. And when it comes to
murder and anarchistic government overthrows, we usually manage to resist.
But it’s the little things that we can’t seem to stop ourselves from doing.
Here are 10 crimes we all commit every day.
Honestly, who has time to walk around the perimeter of an intersection when
you could just cut across the middle? Or wait for one of those annoying “Don’t
Walk” signs to change, when there’s clearly no cars coming? We just look both
ways and hustle on over, right?
Same as the jaywalking thing – ain’t nobody got time to go the speed
limit. Plus, when it’s 4 in the morning and there are no cars on the road, and
you’ve got a three-lane highway spread out empty before you, I challenge
anybody to not put the pedal to the medal and go zoom.
3. Leaving dog poo
Come on, you know you do it. It’s hard to look hot while carrying around a
bag of dog poop.
4. Seat belts
This is something we should all do, because it’s really not that hard, but
occasionally laziness or forgetfulness prevail. Plus, you were just going
around the block! Although, to be fair, at that point, you should probably just
5. Phoning while driving
Another stupid one derived from laziness, or an inability to be patient,
we’re all guilty of checking out phones from time to time while behind the
wheel. You know it’s stupid, you know it’s not worth it, and you know you can’t
Whether you meant to do it or a candy wrapper blew out of your pocket and
across the street, we’ve all littered in our lifetime. As comedian Louis C.K.
put it, one day, God is going to come back and see what we’ve done with Earth
and just be like, “What did you do?!”
7. Facebook hacking
Tampering with somebody’s Facebook profile is always hilarious – who doesn’t
love making it seem as though somebody has just pooped in their pants, or is
issuing a public declaration of love for Justin Bieber? But “hacking”
somebody’s profile is illegal, just like it’s illegal to steal somebody’s
identity. Just be careful you don’t piss them off too much, or they’ll be
totally justified in pressing charges.
8. Illegal downloading/streaming
Yes, the music/film industries deserve proper payment for their work. But
when movie theaters are charging $16 a pop, and you really don’t want to wait
for it to come out on DVD, it may seem like you don’t have a choice. And
Netflix is expensive, too!
9. Reading other people’s mail
It’s a felony, but sometimes you really don’t want to wait for your roommate
to come home to ask if you can borrow their latest issue of Sports Illustrated.
Just don’t open their bills or love letters, and you’ll probably be in the
10. Failing to report tips
For industry workers that make most of, or even just a small portion, of
their dough in tips, it’s illegal to not disclose that information to the
government. Even if you’re just walking with a handful of coins each night,
you’ve got to make sure the proper authorities know!
11. Sharing your medication
Even if it’s just a painkiller, or flu medicine you need to be 18 to get
over the counter, sharing medication prescribed to you with somebody else is
illegal. You might think you’re helping them but you could be harming yourself.
12. Connecting to unsecured Wi-Fi
You’ve probably been to a venue that didn’t have its own Wi-Fi network, so
you clicked around on networks your computer was picking up from nearby
locations. One probably allowed you access, but your computer showed a warning
message saying it was an “unsecured network.” You went ahead anyways, because
you needed Wi-Fi, but that can be a felony.
13. Breaking the terms of services
Be sure you actually read the terms of services agreement for websites that
require you to sign one. Breaking the terms on the agreement can be charged as
a felony. Lying about your age to sign up for a social media platform, or to
enter an alcohol-related website are just some examples of breaking such terms.
14. Singing happy birthday
The circumstances will dictate if it’s a crime, but singing a known song in
public can be viewed as copyright infringement. The number of people who can
hear you and the volume of your song will determine whether or not this is a
15. Playing cards
Check your state’s gambling laws before breaking out a friendly game of
cards at home in which somebody could win money. In some states, you must prove
a legitimate friendship (i.e. non-commercial relationship) with the other
players, or players are prohibited from charging a “fee” to play the game.
16. Hanging at home in your birthday
Even if you are in your own home, in most states, if people can see you
naked, or if there are children present, you have broken a law just by hanging
in your birthday suit on your own property.
17. Failing to register your dog
Registering your dog isn’t only so animal control can figure out whom to
return your pooch to if he gets lost—it’s also the law. Most places even
require you renew your dog’s license each year.